Life Without Walls

I have to rant for a bit.

Microsoft has launched a new ad campaign that I couldn't help but noticing because it's so stupid. I've seen a lot of stupid commercials, but these rank among the worst ever. The campaign is called "Life Without Walls," and I guess is supposed to reject the stereotype of Windows users created by Apple ads depicting Windows users as stuffy businessman-types who follow the crowd and replace it with the idea that every unique person can be a windows user, too. The worst idea about this is that they have PC users upload video of themselves saying "I'm a PC" and giving a statement about themselves, then I'm pretty sure they deliberately chose the worst examples to put in the commercials. Or maybe just the worst of nerds and Deepak Chopra* are likely to upload themselves.

Here's an example of one of the ads; but I have to warn you, there are some creepy people in this video:

First off, do you really want a life without walls? There's no privacy in a life without walls! What you really want is a life without limits, but with plenty of protective boundaries, such as walls. Maybe this is to put a positive spin on Windows' susceptibility to viruses; there are no walls to keep the viruses out. And if you replace "walls" with "limits," then you really do want to go with Apple, since you can run Windows on a Mac (as fast or faster than on an equivalent PC!), but you can't run MacOSX on a PC. Which one has more limits?

Secondly, by starting your ad with the guy from Apple's Mac vs. PC ads, and having everyone say "I'm a PC," Microsoft is unwittingly admitting that Apple controls the board here. They're acknowledging that Apple, with it's small but growing market share, is a threat. Seriously, ever since Steve Jobs went back to Apple and saved their butts, Apple has single-handedly driven the computer market and now the gadget market. If you got a Zune because you refused to buy an iPod, thank Apple for forcing Microsoft to make a product to compete. If you're a Blackberry fan excited for the new version coming out, thank iPhone for turning the smartphone market on its head practically overnight. If you like the colorful George Foreman Grills they had awhile back, thank the original often mocked but often imitated colorful iMac, which saved Apple from extinction. Apple sets not just the trends but the standards, and is driving the entire PC market today, and this awful ad campaign acknowledges that.

Stuff that imitates Apple products:

And finally, if you were Microsoft, would you really want that to be the face you show to the world? Seriously? You couldn't find people who aren't completely socially awkward nerds to show in your ads? This doesn't help the stereotype they're trying to fight, it just replaces it. At least the PC guy in the Apple ads looks like a normal guy; now I'm seeing the "real" PCs, and they're stereotype nerds.

That's a bit harsh, I suppose; surely they're not all that bad. Let's look at another one:

I'm still not being fair, because it's way too easy to make fun of Tron Guy, especially since he's everywhere these days. I should be nice, though (see comments!), since Tron has been a favorite movie of mine since I was little, and the purpose of this post is more to question Microsoft's judgment than mock a super-fan. So how about more of this guy:

They really do have some somewhat normal people, too, though:

Though some of those guys I still wouldn't want in my ad. There are more at Microsoft's website, both normal people and weird ones, like this guy and this guy. I thought about submitting my own "I'm a Mac," just out of spite, but then I decided I don't really feel like it.

Anyway, I get really annoyed by stupid commercials, and I just couldn't let this one escape.

*If you want to see a real idiot who is more than an average guy, watch Deepak Chopra talk about why he is a PC:

In the montage ad they show him saying "I'm a PC, and a human being. Not a human doing, not a human thinking; a human being." Well, how profound, Mr. Philosopher man! Maybe you should do some more thinking and doing, you might be of some value to this world rather than spouting gibberish about quantum healing and other nonsense. Seriously, what is that supposed to mean?

ArcGIS + Windows = One hour of work takes ten.

That's my current Facebook status. While I wait for a simple task (aligning two small maps) to finish (67% after sixteen minutes), here's a funny dialogue box I recently encountered:

Does that make sense to anyone? Oh, yes, this is in this computer lab.

(Update: The process in question took 22 minutes and 44 seconds to complete.)

New Computer Lab Awesomeness. Also, Sarcasm.

I meant to post this a week ago, but I'm very lazy.  Every Tuesday this semester I work in the geology computer lab in the Romney building at BYU-Idaho.  Three weeks ago today, I helped install new computers.  The recent appearance of several new iMacs in the library gave me a spark of hope that we'd get iMacs here, but it was never that likely and it didn't happen.  But any upgrade from the crappy computers we had before is good, right?  Until last Tuesday, two weeks after installing the new computers, this is what the lab looked like:

Out of the fifteen new computers, three were dead for two weeks (bad hard drives, I think).  That's a 20% failure rate.  Fortunately, we have a highly competent IT department here at BYU-Idaho. Here's an example of their amazing ability to think things through:

The old computers were HPs, and they fit in these small metal cubby-like boxes attached underneath the table.  The newer, faster Dells come in much bigger boxes (why anyone still makes such a bulky computer I don't understand), that don't fit in the metal cubbies.  Being very concerned that the computers might get kicked over if they weren't secure, the IT guys didn't want to set them on the floor.  So naturally they stuffed them in the cubbies:

Notice it's not even sitting in the box, but the top is scraping.

This was done before I got there to help; I just set up the monitors and broke down the boxes.  I would not have participated in this  Once all the hardware was set up, they started setting up the software, only to find out they'd done something wrong on all fifteen computers and they couldn't fix it using the network.  So they pulled each computer out of the metal cubbyhole, scratching them up even more and even popping apart pieces of the flimsy plastic box these things are made in.  They had to take each one to be "re-imaged," whatever that means.  So it was three days before any of them was working at all.

So all is well now.  Except it isn't, because they installed a virus (Windows) as an operating system, so things are as lame as before, just on a bigger, better screen.  The bright spot in all this is that I don't have to bother with Vista yet.  I was worried, since they came with Vista, but then they down(?)graded to XP.  XP or Vista, Macs ironically still run either one faster than anyone else.  Even the laptops.

But these new computers are at least as irritating as the old ones, and they have a new problem that happens every time anyone tries to use Google Earth.  It's especially bad since so many Geology 102 Lab students have to come in and do their assignments with Google Earth.  In theory, you should just be able to go into BlackBoard (I refuse to call it I-Learn), find the right .kmz file for the assignment, click on it and choose "Open." That used to open the file in Google Earth.  Now you get this message:

If you hit "OK" you get this message:
Then this message:
Tell me, Bill Gates, why your amazing operating system wants me to install Google Earth when it's already installed on the machine?  Or is it just trying to install the .kmz file?  Why can't it do that, then?

So you have to go back to BlackBoard and click "Save" this time, putting the file on the desktop.  Double-clicking on the file to open it gives the exact same three messages.  To get it to work, you have to open Google Earth and then open the file from within Google Earth.  But every time you open Google Earth, this message comes up:
Followed by this subtly different message:
Followed by this message that tells you about the previous two messages:
But then Google Earth opens anyway, with no problems other than the time I opened it and Earth wasn't there.  So why give the messages in the first place?  Why can't I just open the file and Google Earth pops up?  It really makes me appreciate my Mac.

Windows isn't the only problem on these machines, though.  The IT guys were polite enough to think that since Firefox is so superior to Internet Explorer that they would force us all to use Firefox.  There were three Firefox logos on the Desktop.  Notice the one that says Internet Explorer under it:

The Internet Explorer shortcut with the Firefox logo opens.... Firefox.  Internet Explorer isn't in the Start menu either.  You have to do a search for it, or try to find it on the C drive.  I'm all for options; if someone thinks Firefox is the best browser, I think they should have the option to use it.  But if they can use Firefox, why can't I use Safari?  I don't understand what's so cool about Firefox.  Internet Explorer doesn't bother me, but I prefer Safari, and I'd like the option to use an Apple product rather than a Microsoft one (not being Microsoft is the only advantage I see to Firefox).

Well, at least the monitors are nice; 22-inches I think.  Of course, iMacs wouldn't have cost much more if any, would last longer before needing to be replaced, would run Windows just fine if not better, plus there wouldn't have been the issue of the metal cubbyholes, since the whole computer fits neatly inside the monitor.  Also, there would be fewer cables to trip on, and without the cubbyholes, we could fit five more computers in there, one on each row.

Bonus points to whomever can tell me what's odd about this picture.

Overall, it's probably a good upgrade anyway.  The monitors are twice as big as the old ones, and while these new computers don't do anything any faster than the old ones yet, we'll see if there's a notable performance increase this Fall when I learn GIS. Of course, I'll have to rely on other people's opinions, since I never used GIS on the old ones.

I'm done ranting now.